i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Randomize
