Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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