There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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