I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
