; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
