HIV tests are more positive than that guy
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
17 year olds will be the death of me.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
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