just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
