Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
You dont lie about slip and slides
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
