They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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