She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
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