if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
