Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
