He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
