"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
she looked like the before picture.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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