we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Is that strawberry winking at me??
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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