Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Randomize