We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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