he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
You can't just leave with hair like that
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
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