Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
