i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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