so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
this hospital has no fireball
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
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