Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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