Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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