But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize
