Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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