i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
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