i'm signing you up for texting rehab
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
