you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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