then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
