I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
