I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Randomize
