Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
