she was so not down for the gang bang
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
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