I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize