did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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