So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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