i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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