Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize