I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
COCAINE IS GR8
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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