My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
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