Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
The convent might be a nice break from real life
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