i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Pants 0. Shit 1.
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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