Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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