That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
In America we eat man semen.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
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