I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
Life is so much better after having sex.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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