i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize
