How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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