So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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