I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
