The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
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