According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize