strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
